Becoming Hanuman 7

The case for taciturnity.

 

Now that my baby is over one year old, I receive instructions from all including my doctor to focus on teaching my child to articulate words and communicate in a spoken language that we understand. I am asked to repeat certain words and commands so that the child learns faster and we may be able to communicate more easily with the child. Every time we meet a friend or relative, the first question that is posed is “Has she started to speak? Which words can she speak now? Does she say mama, papa? Then their focus switches on to the baby and they start asking her “Where is your nose? Show me your nose?”

 

What in the name of heaven is the hurry? I have never really understood the need to bring speech so hurriedly and in such quantity and intensity in our lives. The stress on speech and talking is rather exaggerated considering the exchanges I see happening around me. I say that the time has come to consider this factor and stress a little on taciturnity. Let’s bring a little silence in our lives.

 

As far as the child is concerned, she is already picking up so much from her surroundings that we are amazed at her ability to sponge in. She is communicating perfectly and we understand her. We are acting as gardeners. We are not trying to push the plant into over-growing itself by speeding the process.

 

 

 

NO! With Love

 

When I was young, in college and still sorting out the everyday contradictions in terms of human relationships, one of the features of my life was to understand the attitude of my parents towards me. From one angle it was clear that I was precious to them and from another angle, they seem to take me for a nincompoop. At one end of the spectrum I was supposed to do them proud by coming up to some standards that were never clearly defined while at the same time I was not supposed to show any initiative and do what I was told. On this point the directions were clear: as if the parents were saying “We are here and know what is best for you. We are doing the thinking for you, all that is needed will be provided; you just have to be a nice, sweet chubby child, the apple of our eyes.” As if they had never bargained for the child to grow and assert some of his own personality.

 When this time did come, it changed into a period of confrontation. It became a competition between two diametrically opposite tendencies. One set in their ways, afraid of change and the other experimenting and exploring, feeding and thriving on change. Eventually the situation came to a pass where all listening came to a stop. Every sentence of my father began with a “NO”. This puzzled me to no end and unfortunately nobody was giving me the right honest answers either. Another of his attitudes was that his wish and pronouncements be carried out or taken cognizance in the here and now. No further discussion or questions were permitted. Even the smallest hint of non-compliance was taken as an aggressive opposition.

Then one day I went to somebody’s house and there I saw a sticker. It showed an older cranky looking man shouting at an obviously younger child: “The answer is No. Now what did you want?” This was the beginning of wisdom finally coming into my life. I realized that a sticker made in the USA, if so universal in its character, is floating around then certainly this attitude of my parents which was puzzling me, is more universally prevalent than is honestly accepted. A little more close observation of all the parents around me, backed by reading The Reader’s Digest made the answers come tumbling into my life.

Today into my late adult life, I am astonished to see how much this tendency to negate and contradict permeates life in general. As I see it, the seeds are sown when the child is growing into an adult and the parents are not grasping this fact in its entirety. They want to protect him and shield him. In their zeal they don’t want him to act at all, as if this way they can protect him from all adversity. The child on the other hand begins first by seething inside and then hiding his true self and living a double life; so to say. The parents get more and more strongly into the denying and the child starts even more vehemently saying No to it. Is it any wonder that the adult who results is afraid that his life will be taken over and therefore learns to say No to everything. His relationships are all difficult; whatever kind it may be- professional, amicable or amorous. This way he gets into a perennial “denial” mode. This perverted character then gets passed on from generation to generation.

Look around closely. How often do you see people agreeing and accepting each other and in comparison how often we are crossing each other out?

Life is getting complicated. Interactions are getting more international, fast and furious. Yet our syllabi of life’s values, especially what we teach our young ones, still remains tinged with the ethos of the 19th century. Just look at our moral education. What are we drumming into our wards under the consideration of morals? Is it really what they would be seeing around them? Today our wards, right from a young age are exposed to behavior patterns on the TV and real life around them which can be safely said leaves nothing to the imagination. Nothing really matches the education with what they see. Is it surprising that young people have only a very confused sense of what is right wrong and correct or incorrect?

Parents and educationists are not leading by example and this is very confusing. For every question the child has, millions of possible answers crop around him. Without personal experience to back this plethora of unexplainable and sometimes terribly contradictory scenes, the child remains in a state of utter melodramatic puzzlement. And, of course, when he asks his elders some very pointed questions, the elders who are still mentally locked up in their Victorian castles, give disjointed and embarrassed answers that only go to increase the child’s consternation.

For example we teach our children to speak the truth and back it up with sayings like “God is Truth” but in practice we rarely show signs of it. Often we even forget that a child is around us and our acts belie our own teachings. When the child is young, the parents are the world in microcosm to the child. He believes in them. Yet ask any child who has traveled in the car with his parents and has ever been stopped by a cop for speeding or jumping a red light; what would he relate as to the exchange between his parents and the cop? He would tell you that the parents immediately began to explain themselves to the cop giving excuses and explanations which were outright fibs. In these kinds of situations, many children tend to correct their parents by blurting out the truth and only get their ears boxed for their effort. So what are we finally teaching the children after all?

 

 

 

What we pass on to children

 

Dear Sir,   Could you please share common negative thinking or notions or patterns which we tend to transmit unintentionally to the next generation.

Warm Regards – Vani

 

Dear Vani,

Thanks for your mail appreciating the points raised.

I can only give you some examples of traits that get passed on.

1) WE pay attention to our child only when sick – this reinforces the habits of whining.

2) Parents lie for small things – children become proud of their ability to lie out of a situation and become habitual fibbers

3) Parents may complain all the time to prove how much they are victims of circumstances, then they may blame their fate – children learn that nothing is their fault but of others and destiny and so they do not make effort to improve themselves.

4) Parents make promises that they have no intention to keep – this becomes a very nasty habit with children of never taking their own words seriously.

5) Then there are other attitudes like parents only thinking of their “fun” and neglecting their children – the children of course become selfishly oriented.

6) Parents do so much for the child that the child never learns anything or become self-thinking or supportive. The child lives in a dream state where he expects everything will be done for him and that the responsibility of his life is on others.

7) Then there are the fears; subconscious fear patterns that get passed on to give complexes. There are also prejudices like separatists thoughts against religions and entire communities, sense of superiority thru religious dogmas, castes and colors of skin.

 

These become huge stumbling blocks in life specially at the work-place, marriages and when you are in a team and later in society when others throw back at you your own reservations.

The world is not designed to correct and show the way – the world simply rejects or accepts us. People are not there to help you or educate you. The world is a huge market place where everyone is out to outbid the rest. You are totally on your own. So much misery can be avoided by inculcating the right attitudes and habits; parents alone can do this as the child is totally under care in the first few years. I say that parents have failed their children in this scenario. That is why I have always advocated that before we get into marriage and produce children, we should also take some courses in psychology, understand general medicine and management principles and some philosophy of life and training programs to live with others and consider others and life in totality. Become a little more conscious than we are. And if nothing else then at least consciously treat children as the most important part of our lives as we are playing with their lives in totality.

Generally speaking 90% of our character traits get passed on. And not only of the parents but also of the relatives and family around us; not forgetting the influences from the TV in which the subconscious messages are even stronger as they are absorbed without the backing of actual experience of life. So in the final analysis there is nothing that we can isolate as negative traits but we can say that all our negative traits get passed on but then so do the good ones. Humanity bumbles along.

The traits become our stumbling blocks and we are hurt by them, we ignore them, give excuses and find scapegoats etc. This is the game of life. Our ego and egoistic self is always in prominence

BUT…When we consciously try to become better people, improve ourselves, then we have to face this aspect and the subconscious does not lend itself to change readily in later years.

The importance of Positivity in raising children which I am afraid is mostly lacking.

At this stage one thing needs to be broached. A word on the ego. What is needed is Transformation – not annihilation.

We need to really change our basic thought process and patterns. We have been indulging in double-cross and talking with a forked tongue all this while. In most cases when we look at life from non-enlightened apparent cause and effect mind that has not learnt to see the world with detachment and intuitively, we see one the biggest falsities totally accepted and promoted by the influencers of spiritual attitudes that the ego has to be done away with. NO. Without the ego we would be non-entities.

The Ego is the primeval force that gives color to our otherwise bland persona. It is the motive force and the source of our vitality. It is an energy that has been under the influence of demonic forces and used by them to further their ends. The poor humans are their tools and they operate thru the subconscious on which the superficial human mind has no control.

The good news is that humans can use their discrimination using their reason and education and goodwill to put a stop to this by simply using their will. They can impose on the ego to do well and positively and lovingly by espousing only kind and compassionate feelings and transform the ego-energy in to something Divine.

What is needed is Transformation – not annihilation.

Educating the children with this mindset can bring in the change that has eluded mankind till now.

See how we promote the negative side of the emotions thru the ego:

 – Success is in accumulating wealth and the power it brings in life. To achieve this end, dishonesty, cruelty and impartiality is tacitly acceptable as along as it does not become too obvious.

– All those who are not with us are our enemies. Enemies are to be destroyed. War is therefore acceptable.

– Women are a lesser species because they have to bear children and are basically kinder so not practical to the pursuit of wealth and war.

 

Q from a friend – What will be your reaction be when she will grow and not listen to you even? Will you feel bad or proud? That time will only take your final exam. It is really tough when somebody you like and trust is not reacting according to your will and wishes.

 

My answer

As for – if she will listen to me or not, I am not expecting her to listen to me. I am not a tyrant that I would expect my child to live by my wishes and will. Expecting children to be reflections of the wishes of parents is a huge mistake. This has been the major stumbling block of our people’s evolution in India.

I am training her to think and decide for herself and showing her the values by examples, stories and sharing with her about my personal life, trials and tribulations and all the lessons learnt the hard way. My attitude is that I am here and I will stand by her and join her. I am not running her life but helping her to run hers. So it is up to her; even now I make her take her decisions.

Feeling bad is an ego thing which is there but in my case I think it will not be so serious a matter. I explain to her why I am doing things, why others do things and such discussions. The whole relationship is based on mutual regard, affection and trust and the understanding that we are two different persons with different fates and destinies.

When adults listen and talk to children, the children never become a problem and stay friends forever. Most adults do not listen to their children but keep on talking to them from high vantage point, ordering them, deciding everything for them and then later the children don’t listen to them – their first wish is to run away.

There is a saying: If we shall not listen to their small concerns now, they will not tell us their major/ big things later.

At the same time, every time an opportunity comes I put across my point-of-view based on the philosophy I have acquired. Hoping that she would be a positively oriented person with enough experience of life and things to know what to pursue and where to go on her own.

I am trying to pass on all that I have done and learnt and adding travels to her curriculum so that she has discovered “herself” by the time she is in her 20s without being contaminated with my wishes and pursuing life to suit me as parents are normally wont to make children do. They plan out for their children in detail and keep on misguiding them in subtle ways so that the children never go far from the agendas of their parents. In a very subtle way, with control on the purse strings the parents make their children carry the burden of their own ideas and weight of their dreams.

I remember the tons of negative thinking that was downloaded into me due to the family conditions and traditions coupled with non-educated thinking. All my life’s energy went into cleansing myself of this burden which was totally misplaced and out of place as the world changed radically when my generation came along and their advice which was conditioned by the thoughts of security was rather trying to keep me back tied to their apron strings instead of letting me fly on my own powerful wings.

Hope I do a better job for her so that she can flower without the need to cleanse herself of our stupid notions.

One of the most important facets of my attitude to bringing children up is to make them realise that cleverness, subterfuge and drama do not take us far. That these are recognisable by others and we do not fool anyone. The route of clear-cut honest simplicity and honesty works better in the long run by making friends and confidantes that gives us a big supportive family worldwide outside our birth family.

All the disposition of friendliness, ability to make things, creativity, the artist in children – all these need nurturing. The parents if they are sincere towards their wards need to make effort to promote and grow with their child.

 

One of the most strongly established thought in the human condition is the premise that the child belongs to the parents. Laws and legalities aside, this is a total error in the spirit world and in the subtle world of matured understanding.

The truth is that parents belong to the child.

No ifs and buts and long explanations. When we have a child, we have taken the child from the spirit world. The moment we take it in our arms, the transaction is complete. We are sold. All that remains to do is to bring it up following the necessities and protocols of the spirit world. All cases are under strict surveillance of the child’s guardian spirits. Misdemeanors, misbehaviours and laxity in bringing up the child to his full potential invite heavy penalties. Call it what you will but this is the truth of things.

 

 

 

Growing up scientifically.

From reading or observation, if you see anything reflected in you, become aware and change it. If you are wondering what to do about it in others, don’t worry. We can only work on ourselves. The Universe will take care of its own.

I tend to think, that underlying laziness and wishful thinking is more in evidence in our decisions than the other way round.

We must dream with expectations and act but live ready to be disappointed.

Most good parents, so called good and virtuous by society tend to be rather arrogant and treat their young with some form of violence in their attitudes. Not being there for the child and not genuinely listening to them is the most subtle form of abuse.

Finally I have matured enough to realise that we are all perfect islands. Complete and irrevocable. We are what we are. They are what they are. Observe, note and make the best of it. There is nothing to be taught and no one is teachable anyway and does NOT NEED teaching. Get this into your head pronto. This is the route to joy and happiness. Do what you have to do and let them do what they have to do and they will anyway. It is all simple chemistry. The Creation has its own chemistry, you have yours and they have theirs. Then when the ingredients mix – often, more often than not, there is BOOM.

I can understand how the word manipulation may be understood or misunderstood. If you will notice this confusion comes from analysing the possible meaning. The word manipulation means much more than the negative connotation people know about. It also means the strategy needed to achieve an end. You have heard of reverse psychology and have definitely seen it in use. This is friendly manipulation. Most humans use direct strength – using their authority if they have or their position in the big wheel which can be something like black-mail which is also manipulation. So we use our understanding of psychology and assist/influence the other person to think on a given track of our choice. This is also manipulation. AND everybody is doing it all the time – it is the only way to live/interact that humans know.

Technically humans are not ready for technology. Humans don’t use their minds to live better. If they want to kill, why not let them have cross bows? The time needed to load them will give some time to reflect perhaps. Even a karate chop can kill. So finally it is the mind that needs to be controlled.

Life, it is said, is a process of learning wherein we shed our sharp edges and mellow down. Yet, if you ask me, it is not a willing effort. We find ourselves in circumstances and situations that force us to batten down the hatch and plain and simple age melts down our ability to show off our arrogance. What if we did this willingly and with full knowledge and the cooperation of our will? This would be yoga. We may even encapsulate a few extra lives into one and come at the other end far greater as a Being than we could have ever imagined in the natural course of things.

Whole lives are spent in searching for tenderness. Quite contrary to this earthly life founded on thorns. The permanence of sweet embraces dreamt of Is in the final Great Experience of eternal Death… How does it matter in which hospital we took birth; or the date or thru who? Are we alive today? Live for today and the moment you are going through in the present. Your past is concentrated here. Your future is focussed in it.

 

 

The Lies we live with.

There is no doubt that we are living in a time of change but we have to as well counter the living conditions as they are after thousands of years of evolution and human development or/and interference. There is also the fact that considering all the factors, everything is in its rightful place but there is definitely room for improvement. This is where the difficulties arise. Sri Aurobindo and The Mother have shown us other possibilities but we have to live and survive with the world as others not-so-conscious people are making it and running it.

But even otherwise, in the normal state of things, leave out all the philosophy, there is a gnawing fact that has become obvious to the general, even slightly aware humanity, that we are living a life seeped in insincere considerations which forces us to put up a façade and live a charade that we at the bottom of our hearts we may not be wanting to.

Self-centeredness is at the core of human nature. Keep this mind when you take altruistic decisions. Specially when talking of things as they ought to be, should be, the right way and more in tune with generous, kind and compassionate ends. The doers don’t really have the same thoughts. They mask it well and fool themselves & others.

This is the change humanity is expecting and waiting for but no-one is practicing; even the ones that profess and show the way to others.

I am giving here some instances to ponder over. Not only ponder but to meditate upon and see within how much of it applies to your own selves.

•          You are friends with an artist or somebody who prides himself to be an artist and a good one at that. He considers himself really worthy of appreciation and regard but is not seeing so happening in life even after he put an exhibition and all. Anyway you are invited to look at his latest creation. …..Now this is where the game begins: You know in that he is not very good and perhaps even consider him a little presumptuous but now you have two options. Live by the truth of your convictions or play the game?

Most people would keep up the appearances, go to see the painting and even praise it, and then sit down to listen to the artist’s explanations about how and what made him make this great piece of art. You will enjoy his coffee. You are of course not really bothered if the painting is good or not for you are neither being asked to hang it in your house nor buy nor recommend for a prize (which in real life is a distinct possibility).

Now tell me is this level of insincerity a good thing? What is to be done if we wish to strictly adhere to the directions of our teachers to be totally sincere because without it we cannot advance on the spiritual path?

What are the thoughts and factors that make you go on with the friendship and this support? Kindness, friendship for other reasons or just because otherwise than the artist he is a good chap over all? But then would it not be a good idea to let him grow up and know his real worth and unchain yourself from this charade?

 

•          I bring up another instance. You are dating a young lady and after 2-3 meetings you are beginning to realize that she is not exactly what you had hoped for. There may be many reasons that you like her or were attracted such as she is pretty, her laughter is lovable, she is a trophy of a kind as she is desired by most young people around her and winning her over is a feather in your cap. For some reason she does like being with you, perhaps it is your rich father and your car but she is not letting you know that and she, very importantly, ready to cuddle up with you. At the young age of hormones in a rage, this is a very big factor.

Now here is the dilemma. To continue the relationship would be a long term disaster. It is trap of a kind and you know it and understand it. But the cuddling and the appreciative looks in public that you get are so exciting. So what do you do? Continue to tell her how lovely she is which is not a lie, continue to tolerate her boring inconsequential long descriptions of her days which is a big lie and enjoy the cuddles for as long as it lasts. There would also be this thought at the back of your mind, that you are clever enough to find ways and means to break it off at any point in time if you so wish it. Then what makes you think she will just disappear one fine day because you wish it?

I see only a lot of wishful thinking, over-estimated sense of worth and devout invitation to providence to give you a good whack on the head.

Now see the conundrum: at one end we have all the teachings, exhorts of our parents, teachers and seniors and at the other end the pleasure laid out before you. What would you do?

 

• The most dangerous sentence humanity has coined is:
• THIS IS FOR YOUR GOOD

 

•          Let us take our health. Our education has taught us many things about many harmful products now masquerading around as food. We may have some general inkling of the harm they do but as it does not make us feel immediately sick we feel it is fine and here is the lie – if everyone is having it, it can’t be all that bad!

Today all journals, Sunday papers, blogs and such are giving away information on everything under the sun yet few take the trouble to read up and even if they do, put it in active practice in their lives. The question is why?

The trouble is listening and reading brings us face to face with choosing between our reality and our pleasures. The immediate pleasures and satisfaction is difficult to forgo.

•          The day comes when we are sick. The pain and discomfort makes us for a moment reflect that we need to take better care of ourselves but what do we do? We go to the doctor and in a short visit of half an hour at most, we come back with a prescription that we hope will cure us totally. At the back of minds there is lurking the misgivings that how can a stranger doctor know more about us and cure us with a few pills but we would rather look away from it all because the enjoyment of life comes first. We have also realized that we get a lot of care and attention when we are sick so it becomes really an incentive to be sick now and then. Then we have convinced ourselves that medical science has all the answers and we can continue to pander to our frailties with impunity. This game of popping pills, trusting people who have no interest in our lives, keeping our eyes closed to warnings from all around goes on. It is a big lie but we are all merrily playing it because the alternative is too demanding and restrictive.

I see a total sense of childish irresponsibility in our living. Hardly the kind of resolve needed to go into Sadhana for self-improvement.

In the occult world all acts and actions follow some rules and line of action. It is like if you add white to black, you will get grey. It cannot be otherwise. In the life of humans things happen, situations present themselves and we often fail to read them properly because either we are not reading them objectively or with not enough sincerity. By this I mean that we all allow our personal agendas to interfere in the analysis process.

Human are very good at tricking themselves into believing that they have a lot of grandiose qualities & about themselves in general. Specially when the mind is full of great words that touch our spirit and we then easily see ourselves having become that. Those that have had the opportunity to be somewhat independent and living isolated lives, are the worst affected.

 

I think now let us move to the basics of all this. The examples we all know but we are gathered here to look into the deep aspect of the human psyche. The point is why we are not prepared to take the bulls by the horns?

We have to accept that living in sincerity would make us do without a lot of things in life for the simple reason that our honesty and sincerity may not be valid currency in this world.

The question also we need to consider is that can we live sincerely or not? My answer is NO; not by simply following a set of mental rules in which we consider some things right and other things wrong. The first step is to be certain that we want to live that way at whatever cost it entails – all the trust and faith in our Guru notwithstanding? I think it is possible but first we need to start paying attention to small tugs your conscience and your Soul will and do make at every moment. These tugs are very small, easily overlooked and with time if not paid attention to tend to become silent. (It is a very unfortunate part that the opposite training is given to children and this conditioning becomes a huge mountain to surmount later. And it is the main reason behind the same old movements being perpetuated in this world.)

 

The Body as I

We are depending too much on the body for fulfillment. And not taking care of it. Cruel isn’t it?

I have come to the conclusion that humans instead of improving mentally slide towards stupidity when they are given more. This shows most in the way they mess up and maltreat their own bodies that they identify with and all know that they are, their life is only as long as they are in a properly functioning body.

People live such self-centered and small-box lives that their preferences and opinions are mostly the same because in their minds they live at a level that they think is best that can be anyway.

Advice generally for humans is like playing the flute to the buffalo.

People can understand only what their minds have already decided. New info upsets the equilibrium: is unwelcome and not needed.

 

 

God you have touched a very deeply avoided subject. I was born with this instinctive understanding and fought parents and family and all instinctively.

Then to run away I married (late though at 46) but the wife came out to be a very hard task master but because of my Ashram background/study of yoga and applied psychology I saw thru it and instead of letting things snowball into a serious quarrel I would keep the tone at a level of letting have her say but not agreeing to the exaggerations and this required a definite control over my thinking process and emotions which were to let things fly. I have only become stronger and more of a dangerous ninja as you might say. But the situation had the effect of perfectioning my own behavior patterns.

Kendra Strand

Always have empathy & hold space for people during whatever process they are working through right now. God knows none of us are perfect! However, there are a lot of hurt people out there that want to hurt others just so they don’t feel alone in their misery. People have sneaky ass ways of attempting to hook you into believing negative programs. 🤹🏻‍♂️ 🃏

They will often appear as a listening ear, and then try to siphon your light right out from under you. Or shame you for whatever you just opened up about.

It’s very unconscious behavior and it takes a ninja to notice. Often the people have no idea what they are doing or saying because it’s just part of their M.O.

If it’s someone you care about, try to reflect it back to them.

Metaphors work wonders in attempts to not make it personal.

But if it goes that far then? … 

Nobody wants to battle all the time with “loved” ones.

Scary shit to navigate in this climate!

Hearts ♥️ wide open but take no shit.

(on the flip side a lot of fun energies too… those are easier to play with though 😅 )

 

What words are registered in your subconscious?

On what words were you brought up?

What words are you carrying in your subconscious? These words form the base of your persona. Everything you think and do is colored by these words. Have you ever thought how your decisions are modulated by the words that you carry within?

It is now a well-accepted fact that our personas are like icebergs. The greater, major part is submerged and remains unseen and yet upholds the little portion that is visible to the world. Every image that we carry since our day of birth is connected with words that went with the images. We interact with the world based on these images imprinted in our memory unknowingly and subconsciously.

Every world carries a little world in itself. It paints pictures in our minds and unleashes emotions in our hearts. So it goes without saying that we should be vary of the words we are bringing up our children on. And we should deeply meditate and focus on the words that we unleash from our mouth and the words that form part of our regular vocabulary. What words and phrases do you use most of the time?

Here is a small example:

A cyclist skids and falls down. These are the comments from passers-by:

–        Are you hurt?

–        Careless bugger.

–        Watch where you are going.

–         He wasn’t paying attention.

–        Hardly the age to go cycling.

You see from above what thoughts got motivated and what words were uttered it is not difficult to understand the state of mind of each commenter –

People who care and who couldn’t care less or are just happy to advise and criticise. Why? Because that is how they were made to think when growing up. This is what they heard and saw around them and their subconscious is replicating automatically.

Over 2,500 years ago, philosopher and poet Lao Tzu taught that our words become actions, which eventually become our destiny.

In first century Greece, historian and essayist Plutarch declared that a speaker’s state of mind, character, and disposition are exposed through their words. And Napoleon Hill, the twentieth century father of personal success literature, asserts that words plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.

“Across the planet, sages insist that words are potent and should be chosen and spoken with care, for they are ‘the most powerful drug used by mankind,’ as Rudyard Kipling warns,” says Darlene Price, president of Well Said, Inc., and author of “Well Said! Presentations and Conversations That Get Results.” If they’re right, it stands to reason that what we say to ourselves and others plays a critical role in helping us achieve success.”

Regardless of how you may define success, words will help manifest that vision into reality.

“There are also words and phrases that can damage your self-image, mar your reputation, and jeopardize your success,” Price says. “To optimize your success, eliminate this language from your vocabulary and never speak it to yourself or another person.”

 

 

Thoughts for would be parents.

Thoughts are entities going around in the Universe like migrating birds. They alight where the conditions are right.

The human mind considers itself as the thinker which we can all agree is an error.

When we make ourselves ready for a type of thought it comes to us. We have the option to accept its arrival or block it out (our emotional or/and physical condition are also instrumental in this decision). When our minds connect in the Intuitive mode the whole process loses its separateness and we merge. Then there is no thinking as humans know it. We are swimming in the thought pool and are welcome to do as we please.

We are not thinking but using the thoughts floating around and available to us. To receive new thoughts the mind has to be broadened and prepared by an all-rounder education + a lot of travelling outside one’s comfort zone. Perhaps a little more reading by different authors (even contradictory) on the subject will enlarge your view to see what I was talking about.

Think about it.

 

A great lot of troubles that visit us are of our own making. (both for psychological and bodily health).

Some vibes that are being generated within us are seeking for corresponding response from the world at large. From both what is happening around us, and by meditating within. In quiet, we can understand what is happening.

 

The business of vibes attracting and responding to other similar vibes can be stopped only from within if psychic silence is maintained. It can be nullified by positive thoughts and intentions; the world rearranging itself around us differently. But IT HAS TO BE psychically, concretely – not just hopeful thoughts in the wind!

 

In general, for the humanity at large, the best I can say is that they should expose themselves. Speak about it. Understand the futility of hiding behind ideas “what will they say?” Let the world see what is happening. The people who start it and the people who let it continue, will both think twice and this puts a relative brake on things.

I have also learnt from life that ill-will and deliberate hurts from people should be treated as accidents of life. We carry and can carry anger in our hearts against other humans and beings only. For inanimate objects like stones and potholes on the way, rains and storms & other similar accidents, are we angry or can we be really angry?

I wish this had been taught to me early – this state of grace and understanding that there is pride and arrogance behind our need to forgive so if we do not take it personally and treat it all as incidents, we simply forget it and go forward with our lives.

It also puts a spiritual spotlight on us and we need to change our behaviour too to fit better into the exposed scenario.

 

This helps in keeping us safe from “sickness” too. Because as was well understood in the past, sickness in us is a response of some kind from within us. When we justify the possibility of sickness, it catches us more readily.

 

 

 

Does our Vanity have no limits? Billions of us. Millions richer and better than us in every way. Yet we are in our minds great and eternal.  What subconscious patterns come to take roots and from where in us? Why is it that our reason never criticises us but rather goes along with the vane thoughts and backs it up with plausibilities? Somewhere in our deep down thoughts some cockroaches are nibbling otherwise we would not spend so much energy in pulling others down.

Whatever has come to us is thru parenting. Then why “parenting” as a subject never focuses on it and what we are sending forth out into the Cosmos as vibrations and thought patterns.

 

 

 

 

 

The Quest.

I have seen 20 or so chosen quotes can take you farther in your quest than most gurus can.

The trick is in reading them once every day. All that is asked of us & we need to do is contemplate.

The mind has to be made to think on those lines and repetitive reminders can eventually start influencing the subconscious mind and with changing thought patterns, life starts changing.

 

Every time you come across a quote that catches your attention or sort of speaks to you, NOTE it down.

 

Over a period of your life time, you will see your list of quotes changing as you do. Let in the change and remove the quotes that do not work for you. Try to keep the list at 20-ish figure. This requires a lot of meditation and deliberation. It is easy to collect but throwing out the not-so-needed requires contemplation.

I am not sure very many people want to have anything to do with this word “change” – of any kind.

They want their moods to be recognised, accepted and appreciated. Their moods are always justified. They don’t see anything negative or need to change.

The CHANGE if any is needed in others around them.

All these people strutting about, hurting others, why does not the world censor them? The carelessness, the taking-for-granted, the hurtful words, the misuse and playing with emotions, the broken promises, the selfishness and the “Lost-in-their-I” attitude etc etc

Want to live in the luxury of certainty, un-encumbered mindless unperturbed leisurely state of total contentment?

– Follow tradition rigidly

– Follow your elders

– Do as you are told

– Never question the priest

– Don’t read.

– Spend your life watching videos on your smartphone.

 

 

So the lesson is that instead of telling people to change and behave differently, let us learn to make our children strong mentally, give them enough motivating philosophy to live by and understand LIFE with.

Teach them the basic truth of life what people are in their core selves instead of the sugar & spice stories that we teach them. Let us be clear that lies, cheats, accidents & heart breaks are part of life so that they go into life with their eyes open.

I don’t think parents are really playing their part and doing this.

 

Parents do not help the children to understand and realise that this world is made for adventure. Everything is so drastically important when we are children. Consequences are not really understood. A little philosophy goes a long way.

I remember when I was a tenant with a family who were old family friends. The younger son would come barging into my apartment telling his 3 year old son – go and raid the refrigerator. Nobody in this world will dare to stop you. Your father is here!

And that was when the child was actually being invited to raid the refrigerator!!

Now if that child grew up into a selfish bully can we blame him?

 

It is so sad that children who are our saviours finally also become so much of our critics that they decide to stay away from us. The fault is ours that we don’t listen to them and of course, then they stop listening to us.

And we never do talk to them properly either. We never exchange our experiences and motives to take decisions that we do and that affects them. We simply never consider the fact that we need to befriend them and make an effort to maintain the friendship.

 

They talk of

Sadness/.happiness

Cruelty/Kindness

Fortune/misfortune etc

Yet note not…..

Nothing is being created specially for you.

Life is what it is.

All the elements are the same for each of us.

These elements were always here and will be for the foreseeable time to come.

Every one of us enjoys the same and gets hurt the same.

It is the same story being retold over and over with some twists that come with the permutations and combinations possible with the millions of factors in play.

Wake up and realise how self-centredness is the painful core in every story.

To avoid non-acceptance we all normally hide behind proverbs, traditional sayings and quotes of people (however stupid or out of context they may be) and worse – behind some book as authority.

We do not realise how untruthful and insincere our life then is and how we discourage and annihilate those who are living out of this “Dishonest and stifling bubble”.

Dealing with Toxic people: 

When older relations get upset & tick you off, it is time for NEW ones and new experiences but always based on past errors. Therefore pay close attention to past errors. Close the door to the imps in this Universe who are needling you. They are there to help you and serve as mentor and mirror; never forget the lessons learnt. Remember the stories and experiences from the “live lessons” but do cutout the nasty people that were involved.

If you are hoping that truth will reveal itself, forget it. Toxic people relate stories that others accept and they twist tales to make others look bad. People do not see thru the machinations. They rarely do (until it hurts them personally) and even if they do, they do not connect it to you.

Your reputation stays where it is.